Financial Frustration

This will sound like a rant... well, it is a rant, but don't let that steer you away.

Life is too expensive. Everything. Costs keep going up, but the quality is not. I understand that as inflation rises, companies raise prices to keep pace, and thus we all have to pay more for the same product just to keep things on an even keel, but it seems that some time between our generation and the last, things got out of hand.

I was raised on the belief that if you work hard, study hard, and make good, responsible decisions, your life would reflect that: you would have a happy home-life, a happy work-life... I admit, it was a modest (naive?) view of the American dream. Frankly, this seems all but impossible in the modern era. I've been responsible, I've worked tirelessly, and I've studied like a madman for most of my life. But to what end? Those traits alone are not enough.

What do I have to do?

I don't live an extravagant lifestyle, and I'm finding it hard to make ends meet. Last year I decided to go back to school. I stayed in-state, even went to a community college to make things as cheap and simple as possible. I worked full-time through each semester, even worked two jobs at one point because I thought that would help augment the huge sum going into my education... Wrong. No matter what I did, the cost was too much.

I know it's silly, and I apologize if this makes me sound arrogant, or like I'm complaining without due reason, but doesn't that seem especially unfair? Shouldn't I be able to easily afford a quality education if I'm working full-time? But I can't. Can anyone?

Even at a community college, the cheapest around, I still had to borrow money and basically forbid myself from living a normal life in order to get by without debt. It was so bad that at one point I only had seventeen cents in my checking account, with a couple days till the next paycheck.

Some suggested I take out a loan, but they're missing the point - I shouldn't HAVE to take out a loan, not for a cheap school and a handful of courses. I will take out a loan for grad school, but that makes sense - at that point, I'll be so overwhelmed by material that I won't be able to work. That part I get. The schoolwork is too intense, you won't have time for a job, so you need a loan to pay for it. Fine. But if I AM working - and working A LOT - shouldn't that be enough?

Yes, it should, but it's not. And THAT, I'm saying, is just not right.

I don't know what the solution is. It's not my job to know what the solution is. But clearly this is a problem. The cost of education is too high to be realistically manageable, and as such the American dream cannot realistically be achieved.

Fistful of Reviews

I said a long time ago that I wanted this blog to be much more autobiographical/philosophical than my last one - ie, not just reviews/opinions - and for the most part I feel like I've failed. On the one hand, I've written these massive entries detailing my thoughts and ideas on issues of politics and religion, but the vast majority are critiques of specific movies, or if not, then they are generally media-based... So while the last few entries have been extremely autobiographical, there have still been quite a few movies, books, and CDs I've consumed, so they need their fair treatment. For brevity, I've limited reviews to a paragraph, so we'll see how it goes...

MOVIES

Breaking Dawn: Part I - 0.5/5
(dir. Bill Condon)
I've written about Twilight before, and I hoped that would be the one/only time that dreadful series would be mentioned on this blog, but alas - while on our Disney cruise, one of the many, many movies we watched was this miserable dreck. I commend Stephenie Meyer for defrauding people out of millions of dollars and years of their lives, but that does not elevate the level of the material. This is garbage - and not even entertaining garbage, a la True Blood. We could pick apart the script, or the effects, or the cinematography, or really anything, but where the series really goes wrong is simply the casting. These actors are the definition of wooden - not an ounce of personality found anywhere in the cast - and thus no matter what happens, the film is dreadfully, terribly boring. (Save one sequence, which actually manages to elevate awful to hilariously awful - found here... if the rest of the film were so ridiculously bad, it would be at least entertaining.)

The Adventures of Tintin - 3.5/5
(dir. Steven Spielberg)
What a delightful (albeit hollow) experience. Spielberg's animated film utilizes every bit of animation wizardry possible to, essentially, create a world even more cartoonish, over-the-top, and absurd than Indiana Jones (which already pushed those traits to the max). The film never reaches greatness - far too content to explore empty avenues for the sake of visual showiness than to ever really focus on a central story - but it nevertheless remains incredibly fun, fast-paced, and entertaining. I'd love to see another one.



The Vow - 1.5/5
(dir. Michael Sucsy)
Another vacuous "true story" that probably could have been good if it actually followed the true story. Instead of something elegiac, which would really capture the pain of such confusion, we instead have this rote melancholy surrounded by plot devices. This isn't "I have to win my wife back because she can't remember me," this is "I have to win my wife back because she can't remember me and these things stand in my way" - if you catch my meaning. McAdams and Tatum are fine to watch (though I don't for a moment by Tatum as the soulful artist/hipster he's supposed to be), but the concept is stretched thin and everything feels so mechanical that it all just feels like an exercise.


The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - 3.5/5
(dir. David Fincher)
God help me, this is going to sound shallow... No matter how many plot holes I might spot, or how utterly disgusting and downright nasty some things in this movie are, I just couldn't dislike it. Even during the (multiple) (anal) rape scenes, or the (multiple) drawn out, grisly torture scenes, I couldn't tear my eyes away. And this wasn't attraction by disgust (a la Cannibal Holocaust, which purposely tries to offend every possible sensibility), this was attraction by respect. For all its problems, its shoddy storytelling, its overlong/redundant/non sequitur conclusion, and its weak characterizations/motivations, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo remains engaging, interesting, and (yes) entertaining because it is such a great example of filmmaking. Every single shot is perfectly composed, adding layers of depth and intrigue to a story which (frankly) seems more built on shock than suspense; the music ebbs and flows with the moods of its protagonists; and actors do such a great job that you forget that you basically know nothing about them - they're plot devices, travelling around gathering red herrings and MacGuffins, but you really don't care because they're so interesting to watch. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is full of such devices and problems, but it's so exquisitely crafted and finessed that you just don't care. You want to watch these horrible things. David Fincher may be Hollywood's most skilled filmmaker - too bad Hollywood doesn't seem to care.

Prometheus - 2.5/5
(dir. Ridley Scott)
What a paradox... Like Fincher's aforementioned The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Prometheus is a visual marvel. Beautiful to watch, the film is awash with wonderful imagery... but unlike that film, Prometheus is undercut by inadequate (even inappropriate) material. Specifically, the film is too smart for the script. The story starts off well, with ambitions no less lofty than the very origin of species and the relationship of man, god, and creation... but then quickly devolves into standard horror fare, constantly bringing these questions up again only to sidestep them and kill off some side characters. Prometheus is, in short, a disappointment. I was expecting great things, instead I got only mediocrity. I commend the film and its makers for bringing up such Big Questions, but if you're never going to address them (really address them, that is - a few characters constantly raise the questions, no matter what is happening in the scene or the rest of the film, but these rumblings seem to be more reminders than actual discussions), then it's all for naught. There are likewise some massive mistakes in the basic science of the film (I know, I know - it's science-fiction, but I'm talking about fact-checking, not conceptual items)... It all adds up to a film which is profoundly shallow, and I get the feeling that if this existed on its own rather than as part of the Alien series, it would have been much, much better. Unfortunately, we have to take the movie as it is, not as it should be, and Prometheus is simply not good enough.


Hanna - 3/5
(dir. Joe Wright)
A friend of mine summarized Hanna as "Run Lola Run, but with a plot." While I find his comment too dismissive of Tykwer's wonderful little film, he's not entirely off the mark. Hanna is almost entirely about itself: how it looks, how it sounds, how it feels. There is very little character development; in fact, many times the only thing which distinguishes one character from another (really) is a particular accent or costume color scheme. Like Run Lola Run, the music and editing drive Hanna more than any identifiable story, which can be summarized thus: Hanna has been genetically modified and trained to be a super soldier, and when the government finds out about her, they want to kill her before word gets out that she is an experiment gone awry. Tykwer's influence is clear, but I also detected a pretty sizeable influence from Wayne Kramer's fantastic Running Scared, especially with all the fairy tale/fantasy elements. Hanna only exists in a filmic sense, which both emboldens the film and hinders it. A hesitant recommendation.


Brave - 3/5
(dir. Mark Andrews, Brenda Chapman, & Steve Purcell)
For Pixar, this is slumming... Not that Brave is a bad movie or anything, it's just so... typical. There is not one moment within Brave's entire running time that you wonder what is going to happen, or if the princess will succeed. So what, you say - the same is true of virtually all kids' movies. Too true, but Pixar has branded themselves by being surprising. We knew Wall-E and Eva would succeed, but there was a sense of desperation in the villains and characters that actually set your heart racing and made you wonder if they would... likewise, we knew the Incredibles would be victorious and the family would be all the stronger, but I don't think anyone expecting the villain to be so cunning and threatening... It's these little things that set great family films apart from something like Brave, which never has the guts to take a chance with its characters or its material. The film speaks on themes like fate, destiny, and changing your fate by following your destiny... Perhaps if Brave wasn't so fated in virtually every scene, it would fit in with Pixar's destiny.


MUSIC

Clockwork Angels - 4/5
by Rush
I'd venture to say that despite their near-four-decade career, it's probably never been a better time to be a Rush fan... or maybe even an actual member of the band. Just a couple years ago, the band had a highly-acclaimed documentary hits movie theaters; they've been on the Colbert Report; their latest tour was so successful they actually put off finishing this very album... Everything's coming up roses for the Canadian power trio, and it's actually a kind of vindication for them and their fans. Any Rush fan worth his salt has been a fan for years (these are not "fair weather" fans interested in the latest single - they stick around), and it really does provide some comfort when an obscure band of gifted musicians finally gets their due... That said, though, how's the album? Clockwork Angels is, thankfully, really damned good. Fast-paced, hard-hitting, endlessly listenable and entertaining - everything a good album should be. And it's a concept album! So if you really want to, you can delve into the lyrics and examine a fully fledged narrative about oppression, suppression, and the triumph of free will (pet topics of lyricist/master drummer Neil Peart) - but each track also manages to stand on its own, drawing comparisons to The Who's Tommy. Long cast to the sidelines as a "second-tier" guitarist, Alex Lifeson shows that he's still got some fire to those fingers - all the more impressive when most men half his age couldn't manage these licks. Tracks like "Headlong Flight," "Caravan," and "BU2B" highlight the band's legendary musical skills, but "Wish Them Well" and "The Garden" also manage to show a soft side the band has mostly ignored. It goes without saying that the album plays better if you're a fan, but I'd be willing to venture that Clockwork Angels packs enough punch to win some converts. Welcome back, boys.


BOOKS

Cloud Atlas - 3.5/5
by David Mitchell
English author David Mitchell has earned himself quite a reputation over the past thirteen years. Of a scant five novels, two have been short-listed for the esteemed Man Booker Prize (and two others were long-listed). Cloud Atlas is one of these. One of the major problems with Cloud Atlas is that it's kind of a gimmick... okay, not kind of a gimmick - it is a gimmick. Six individual stories are told such that they interrupt each other about halfway through, until you get to the sixth story, which is told all the way through; and then you work your way back through the conclusions of the remaining five. So you start with one character, read his tale, which is then interrupted (sometimes mid-sentence) by another tale, which is likewise interrupted by another tale, and so on, like a series of nesting dolls. And on top of that, each story takes place in a different timeframe, a different part of the globe, and is written in a distinct style. For example, the opener is set in the nineteenth century and is written as a diary; jump ahead to an epistolary written by an arrogant orchestral composer; then to a seedy crime novel set in the 60s; then a dystopia full of clones and product placement, a la Philip K Dick... you get the idea. The novel forces you to recognize Mitchell's talent, and at times his prose can be so clever it borders on inane... And yet, it remains something special, unique, at times extraordinary. You get caught up in the gimmick. Each story is absorbing, engaging, funny, shocking - you could resent Mitchell for his skill and intelligence, or you could just give in and admire him. Besides just keeping track of what is going on, there are a number of major themes here which beg to be examined further... Some of these are made pretty obvious (toward the end, for instance, a number of passages deal explicitly with the permanence of war and man's violent nature), but others remain much more intriguing and subtle (for example, the cyclic nature of the novel underlies the unstated theme of reincarnation; or the abrupt shifts in time/space can be indicative of our own memories or perceptions of time and location). I'm very intrigued to see how on Earth a movie can be made out of this, but it will also be nice to see such a challenging yet rewarding book get the inevitable boost from that adaptation.

The Honeymoon

Where to begin regarding our honeymoon? First of all, for a long, long time we weren't sure what we wanted to do. Kate was really pushing for a very long trip abroad. Potentially multiple months, all throughout Europe. Appealing as that may be, however, reality settled in once I started going back to school and especially once I started working at the hospital... It would be very hard to afford such a trip (because who wants to stay in a hostel during a honeymoon?), and with a fairly new job, that kind of timeframe is just unrealistic.

So we started thinking of other possibilities... We thought for a long time about Spain. But there were similar problems - because once you're already over there, you kind of want to go as many places as possible. Then we thought of Hawaii, which was a real possibility for quite a while. That was eventually axed when we decided we didn't want a beach vacation really. (Not that there isn't more to Hawaii than beaches, just that we wanted to get the most for our money.)

Eventually we started looking at cruises. Not sure when or how (neither of us had ever done a cruise before), but that seemed like an intriguing possibility. There were exotic cruises that would take you all over the world, and considering the number of locations as well as the all-in-one convenience, the cruise option quickly crept to the top of the list. But where to go? Soon after we started talking about Alaska. Again, neither of us had ever been, many of the cities we wanted to see were only accessible by boat/plane, and it seemed like a great mix of activity and natural beauty.

Thus it was decided - Alaskan cruise. And considering Kate's love of most things Disney, a Disney Alaskan cruise.

THE FIRST LEG - OLYMPIC NATIONAL PARK

The cruise on its own was not enough, however; we needed something else to occupy ourselves. The logical extension was to spend some time in Washington because the cruise was leaving out of Seattle... So it was settled: we would go around Washington for a few days on our own itinerary, and then board the ship as planned.

That was the best decision we made.

I don't want to speak for Kate, but I think she would fully agree: the few days we spent together on our own going to various lodges and hiking trails around Olympic National Park were the highlight of the Honeymoon. There is just something so satisfying about being on your own schedule and getting to simply enjoy the world around you with the person you love. These were not complicated days - often we would simply wake up, have breakfast, hike around a few hours, drive to our next location, have dinner, and go to bed - but they were so very sweet and intimate. I'd love to spend all my days so occupied.

Lake Quinault lodge

Cedar plank salmon - delish!

Dungeness crab cakes - also great!

So, lest it sound exceedingly vague and dull, what did we do? We started off at Lake Quinault, a massive lodge built in the 1920s and largely in the same condition now as it was then. It's a beautiful space with a number of nearby trails and perhaps the best overall food of the whole trip in my opinion. The view from the restaurant was also pretty extraordinary... I felt bad during meals for being quiet, but I was so stunned with the food and the wonder of the surroundings that words somehow seemed useless.

This was followed by Kalaloch Lodge, which was probably the nicest overall accomodation. The food was not as good as Quinault, but the view was breathtaking: the cabins were built near a precipice, and from your room you could see/hear/smell the ocean. This was my favorite spot overall. We spent a lot of time reading by the soothing quiet of the ocean, and then ran down to the beach during sunset for some remarkable pictures.

Talk about a VIEW

Early next morning we went down again, and the tide was so low that we were actually able to walk on these massive rocks covered with mussels and other strange sea creatures. My favorite was a kind of anemone-looking thing which resided in little pools within the rock and would actually grab your finger if you touched the little "leaves." Very cool.

From there it was off to Sol Duc Hot Springs, probably my least favorite. There was only one trail nearby (which had some amazing waterfalls that Kate captured some equally amazing photographs of), and the springs themselves were basically pungent hot tubs. Additionally, the accomodations here were not as nice and the food more "standard." Nice to do once, but not as unique as the other locales.

(We also stopped in Forks, WA, because Kate thought it would be funny to see the setting of Twilight... I feel so bad for the townspeople there. First, there's nothing to do there - the town is smaller than my home town and destitute - but more importantly, every single surface is covered with "Twilight" memorabilia... shirts, posters, shoes, boots, moccasins, wine, coffee, burgers, shakes - any possible item which could be sold and slapped with a "Twilight" label was subject to such treatment... I would leave. In a heartbeat.)

Copper River salmon on the right - BEST FISH EVER

We ended our trip around Hwy 101 (which encircles the entire park) with a day in Seattle, treating ourselves to the Aqua restaurant on the waterfront as well as the luxurious W Hotel. Talk about service! And talk about food! We tried the Copper River King Salmon based on its reputation, and I seriously have never had a fish which tasted so good. Amazing. Worth every penny and then some. Additionally, there was a live pianist with the most diverse range of material I've ever heard in an upscale restaurant. He played lounge piano versions of everything from Nirvana to Johnny Cash to The Beatles, all while wearing these rad Wayfarer sunglasses. And then when we got back to the hotel, they gave us free champagne and strawberries! How perfect!

DISNEY CRUISE (& EVERYTHING AFTER)

From the W, we walked to Pike's Place Market for a little stroll around downtown Seattle, and then by late afternoon it was time to board the cruise ship - the enormous Disney Wonder. Over a thousand staterooms, thousands of guests, pools, hot tubs, a gym, a spa, numerous restaurants - so many things were on this ship the possibilities were dizzying. And one of the first people we met was a peculiar teenager who had already been on five Disney cruises (and wound up watching The Avengers for the ninth time while onboard). For a couple who had never been on a cruise before, it was all a bit overwhelming.

And then we started moving... and then it was quickly underwhelming.

After strolling around the ship for a while, getting the grand tour of the spa (where they tried their damnedest to justify hundreds of dollars for every mundane treatment), and trying to get a feel for where all the important things were, we learned by the end of the night that we're not really cruise people. A little of it had to do with the ship itself - Kate never vomited, but was acutely seasick that first night when the engines were running so hard against the wind that our dinner table was literally shaking (subsequently, she put herself on bedrest the next day and bought "seabands" for the remainder) - but really it was the lack of activity.

Understandably, a Disney cruise is primarily aimed at families and kids, but there really just isn't much to do on a boat for an extended period of time... and we spent the first two days at sea - ie, no stops were made, and thus you could only entertain yourself while aboard. We worked out every once in a while, had our three meals a day, watched movies... but what more can you do? Kids had an arcade, games, classes, all manner of distractions... "adult" activities were almost exclusively centered around alcohol (or worse, "how to" classes about making your food more presentable, or folding towels into animal shapes). To say we were disappointed would be an understatement.

The food was decent. Breakfasts were almost entirely buffets, dinners were pretty nice, but lunches were terrible. None of the ship restaurants were open for lunch, so you had to go to various "snack" locations to try and find a sandwich or fruit or salad - all of them invariably cold. Disney's saving grace was their premier restaurant - Palo, which featured outstanding service and food, but you had to pay a little more for each meal.

Appetizers

The entertainment was inadequate. While Kate's sea-nausea is mostly to blame, we watched most (or all) of about twenty movies. All of them either Disney or from companies Disney owns. Not because we wanted to (well, some of them we wanted to), but simply because there wasn't much else to do. We saw two of the Broadway-style shows: "Disney Dreams," an extremely entertaining revue which also featured its own narrative. This was the highlight of the onboard entertainment, and it has apparently been named the best of all shows on any cruise ship; the second, "Farewell," was basically an advertisement to go on another Disney cruise.

So if we had such a bad time, why am I mentioning all this? Well, first of all, it wasn't that bad. Really, things were perfectly fine, just a little dull. And boredom on a cruise ship can be especially maddening because there is nowhere to go. The excursions, however, were actually quite nice. Our first port was Skagway, where we biked, hiked, and floated for most of the day. That was actually lovely. We got to see the town, learn a little of its history, and enjoy the natural beauty. All the things we had come for. Additionally, we tried a "spruce tip ale" which was pretty tasty - an ale which contains actual tips of spruce tree leaves, an ingredient which adds nearly all of your daily Vitamin C and was an early custom by sailors to avoid scurvy.

Vitamin C - very important

The next port was Juneau, where we went whale watching. We didn't get as close to the whales as hoped, but we did get to see them come up and then the tell-tale fin disappear below. A nice, relaxing excursion. That same day we also went to see Mendenhall glacier, the fastest-receding glacier in the world; and also to a local salmon bake, which was delicious. Loved that. Kate also did some gold-panning behind the restaurant, coming up with a bunch of tiny flakes.

Sifting, ever sifting

Finally we also went to Ketchikan on a particularly nasty day, where we did a bit of fishing, which unfortunately proved a bit complicated because of some occasionally heavy rain. Kate did manage to catch two fish, however (nice job!), while I caught none. I did have a pretty heavy fish on the line, but it must have managed to escape - by the time the line was up, the bait and fish were gone. One really cool thing was we actually got to see an Orca really close to the boat. Our guide said it was pretty unusual to see the Orcas in our particular location because the water was so shallow (not even 150 feet), but still - a great sight nonetheless! My excuse is that he ate all the fish, and that's why we didn't do better.

Our last port was actually in Canada, where we visited Butchart Gardens. This stop irritated me quite a bit... First of all, the Disney staff was quite disorganized as far as getting people off the boat in a timely manner; second, we did not even have two hours at the location... and it was at night! The whole point was to have a leisurely walk around this world-famous botanic garden and enjoy an afternoon tea... That's hard to do when the bus arrives at 8:05PM and you have to leave by 9:45PM. The grounds were indeed very stunning, but the timeframe was far, far too short, especially for the price.

And that was pretty much it... Getting home was a bit of a nightmare, fraught with all sorts of delays and problems once we actually got back, but why dwell on the negative? I did enough of that complaining about the Disney cruise.

It was a lovely honeymoon, we accomplished all the things we wanted to, but there were a few elements which could have been better... I'd venture nearly all honeymooners could admit the same. If we had it to do over again, I'd probably opt for a shorter cruise and more time on our own in Washington, but I still had a lot of fun. Once in a lifetime.

Gorgeous

PS... One of the PA programs I've applied to is in Oregon, which is very comparable to Washington (or so I'm told). This trip was a bit of a test run to see if I could envision living out there... Well, dear reader, let's just say that if I were to get accepted, it would be very hard to move back. The Pacific Northwest is an amazing place to be - I look forward to going again.

...White Wedding

Just to make this easier, I've organized it into sections.

BEFORE
The day started at about 8AM. I needed to be up for a specialty shave/hair cut with my dad at 9:30AM. After a quick breakfast, we headed over to The Art of Shaving. I mentioned this before, but the old-fashioned shave - while expensive - is a nice extravagance every once in a while. Very relaxing, and they do a nice job too.

First step to a good shave.

After that, it was a quick shower and pack job to make sure I had everything for the day. Kate's gifts (the big one, and the little one), my suit, music, toiletries, etc. Everything. Even an overnight bag for the hotel. I hitched a quick ride over to the club at 12:30PM, and after quickly getting dressed, wandered around for a while to see the venue and take it all in. Other vendors were busy setting things up for themselves (note the floral arrangements below, and the half-arranged dining room), so it was kind of neat to see "behind the scenes."

Around 1PM other groomsmen started to arrive. Snacks were had, jokes exchanged. While Michigan Shores Club is kind enough to provide a bridal room, the men simply have the locker room, where we indeed saw at least one man in a speedo, someone else walking around naked, and finally a third man bring his little girl so she could use the bathroom. Not the most glamorous of locations, but all's well that ends well.

Photography started at 1:30PM, with an unexpected group of four from Misha Media (also amazing - check them out!), shuttering away my every move as I added tie, cuff links, vest, and jacket to my outfit. While Kate and I love everything they've done, I have to admit that I felt really awkward at times, especially redoing certain actions or even just pretending them... but that's the way these things work. Group photographs soon followed, and I'm sure that the masculine setting served my group well; I'm anxious to see how they turned out.

The so-called "First Look" was scheduled for 3PM... Things went a little late with Kate's morning appointments, though, so it was more like 3:20 - which is perfectly fine. She looked absolutely stunning. Seriously. Radiant. Gorgeous. (And not one of those an exaggeration.) After a few minutes with just the two of us and our general reaction shots, the entire bridal party was photographed over the course of the next hour. Park pictures, street pictures, beach pictures - lots of cool options, and I can't wait to see what they came up with. No matter how things look, though, I can certainly guarantee that they've never had a bride stop to pick up ice cream on the way to the venue, which Kate did... in a very expensive wedding dress. She's one of a kind, truly.

CEREMONY
The ceremony was a breeze. Somehow, despite our officiant omitting certain portions, the entire ceremony was shorter than the half-hour rehearsal. How? No idea, but it flew by. Thankfully, I think it still carried some weight to it, but don't ask me to recall too many details. I know that standing up there my heart was pounding. Kate teared up at the start and had some big eyes going on, but we both gradually calmed as the service went on.

Just married!

Some of the more unique things... While the bridal party did process to the standard "Canon in D," Kate's entrance was to the lesser known "River Flows in You," a contemporary song which is delicate, beautiful, and far more interesting than the typical "Wedding March." The pianist did a great job, though there was a bit of a delay as the bridal party wasn't quite sure when to start coming in. We had a total of three readings: Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, a passage from the I Ching, and a short passage from Keats's Endymion. I managed to sneak in a quote from the Pynchon masterpiece Gravity's Rainbow for my vow, and Kate used a line from Romeo & Juliet in hers. The florist constructed an arch which was pretty amazing. We didn't know what to expect when she mentioned what it would look like, but the final product was fantastic. Added a lot to the ceremony.

AFTER
Formal portraits with various family members and group shots immediately followed, as well as the cocktail hour. I barely saw Kate during the cocktail hour, but that's fine - we both hit a lot of different people. Again, I was worried about everyone getting along (my family is the "country mouse" to her family's "city mouse"), but things went splendidly. One of my uncles in particular was a hit with the young crowd, as he came adorned with an authentic calf-vertebrae neckerchief and morning coat. We also showed the great Buster Keaton film Seven Chances to reinforce the "vintage" theme (it played on a wall, available for anyone to see), though few watched it because they were so busy talking. As the bride and groom, we thankfully had a sample plate specially reserved for us (indeed, over the course of the evening I found out that we each had a waiter specifically assigned to us), otherwise we would have completely missed the appetizers.

We extended the cocktail hour by about fifteen minutes because things were going so well, and then it was time for the formal meal. After our grand entrance to the cheers of 100+ (and the jazz staple "Moonlight Serenade"), we finally got to sit down for a little bit. Drinks nearby, salads were quickly downed and speeches began. Kate's father welcomed everyone with a toast, comparing his relationship with Kate to Mr Toad's Wild Ride in a particularly brilliant way. This was followed shortly after by Mark, the Best Man, and Jessie, Maid of Honor, both of whom had sweated for a while about their speeches, and delivered some great work. Funny, insightful, touching - everything a toast should be.

My hopes for the main course were dashed when Kate said post-speech was the perfect time to make our rounds, so off we went. The usual sorts of exchanges took place, but there was no faking it. Everyone was genuinely excited for us, and we were genuinely  excited to have them. The air in the room was electric. Sure enough, however, by the time we got to the last table, our food had been taken away because the staff assumed we were done... but then they brought it back! Our super-awesome special waiters brought hot new dishes so we could actually sit and eat, which we promptly did... Well, I did anyway - Kate still wanted to double-check and make sure we hit everyone. I downed that Cornish game hen as quickly as I could.

Force-fed!

And then, just like that, the party was upon us. Which meant Kate and I had to kick it off with a dance. But first, cake. Our cake was from a local vendor (Three Tarts - also delicious), and this was the only part we hadn't given any thought to other than the flavor... so when they asked us to cut the cake, we really had no idea what to do. I didn't know if we were supposed to feed it to each other, or do that "pie in the face" routine, or what - so we ended up cutting probably the smallest piece imaginable and then giving each other a bite. Delicious, but tiny.

Now dancing.

To be perfectly honest, I'd been dreading this. I'm not a big dancer in the first place, and the prospect of dancing in front of a huge number of people just makes it that much less appealing. What's worse, Kate and her dad actually had a couple dancing lessons! So while she helped by actually showing me some real dance moves, I really had no time to perfect them. The result was a fast, somewhat clumsy version of a foxtrot set to Michael Buble's "That's All." Normally, I shy away from Buble, but the song is very sweet, and we both agree with the sentiment. It was over in no time.

This dance was followed by Kate and her dad to "Moon River" and then finally me and my mom to "My Wish." The band shortened the parent songs at our request - everyone felt a little awkward about the tradition - which means the party proper started with a bang. The band picked up the tempo, and from there the party really didn't slow down, much less stop. EVERYONE was dancing (even my family, which is saying something pretty remarkable), even my dad, who was perhaps the star of the night with his "wild man" routine. I've never seen him dance or move so quickly in my life. It was hilarious and even a little terrifying... I will never forget it; no one will ever forget it.

Blurry, I know, but he was just that fast!

After a bit of mingling, dancing, and drinking, the evening started to wind down. The photographers took us around the building for some more intimate photos, and gradually more and more people said goodbye. It was so nice to see the positivity just radiate from them, as I'm sure it did from us. Things ended far too quickly.

AFTER AFTER
...Or did they?

When we were searching for an appropriate venue, what really sealed the deal for us with Michigan Shores was one simple thing: they had a bowling alley. Every place has a reception area, a dance floor, and an optional area for cocktails/ceremony. What set Michigan Shores apart (aside from having more character than your typical banquet hall) was the fact that it had a bowling alley, with black lights and all. For eighteen months, we've referred to the bowling alley as the "cherry on top."

Girls changed out of their dresses - no more heels. Guests had beer, pizza, loud music - you could really just kick back and relax. A certain left-leaning groomsman tried to unionize the wait staff. It was the perfect way to end the evening, and the perfect way to start a marriage. The most fun I've ever had; I can't wait to see what's in store for us.

I love my wife, I love my life.

Nice Day for a...

I know it's old news by now, but Kate and I are finally married! Woo hoo!

Pardon my indulgence, but a couple entries to celebrate that fact...

First off, rehearsal day. I don't want to speak for Kate, but I honestly think that both of us managed to keep our cool throughout the entire eighteen-month engagement/planning process... right up until we were at the altar practicing the ceremony. For me, that's when it really "clicked." Up to that point, we were basically stating preferences and choosing between such and such options for such and such overall effect... but when it all started to come together, a little voice inside me started saying, "Oh God, this is really happening isn't it?" Not in a panicky, let's-call-it-off way, but in a we're-about-to-make-the-leap-and-I-can't-believe-it way.

Do we look nervous?

The butterflies started flitting and flying.

For the most part, things went off without a hitch... except for the fact that I broke Kate's dress and made us twenty minutes late to our own rehearsal, which we only allotted an hour for to begin with. To explain: Kate had long ago bought a special "rehearsal outfit" that would also serve as a wardrobe change at the end of the wedding day. A very flowy piece from Anthropologie's bridal store BHLDN, quite pretty. I don't know much from women's clothing, but this particular piece could have used a little structural support. Case in point: the top is a halter, and the strands cross in the back to be tied. Looks lovely, but they pass through this tiny piece of fabric intended to hold them in place. Well, the fabric is just a little too delicate, and when Kate asked me to tie it just a little tighter, that tiny little piece broke right off, so in a panic Kate had to sew it back on as quickly as possible, all the while incensed (understandably) with me.

After that (and a few heckles from my groomsmen, whom I had chided about punctuality), it was smooth sailing. We paired up our respective attendants, and the officiant did a read-through of most of the ceremony. He wisely omitted some of the more important segments (the kiss, the vows, his homily) for "suspense," and wisely practiced the staging of some of the trickier segments - ie, the candle-lighting ritual, our own movements throughout the ceremony, etc.

Considering my faith is verging on atheism and Kate is largely pantheistic, it should be no surprise we steered away from the religiosity of a typical wedding. Any sentiment that suggested Kate was in any way subservient to me, or I to her, or otherwise implied that one of us was "in charge" was eliminated; the ceremony/cocktail hour/reception were all held in one building, not a church; and while we did have one Biblical reading, it was more to emphasize the strength of our partnership than any sort of religious endorsement (Ecc. 4:9-12). Further along this vein, perhaps the best decision we made was to ask someone we knew to perform the ceremony, rather than hire a minister simply for appearances. We chose a family friend of Kate's who actually runs a theater company with his wife (First Folio - check them out!), and his professionalism and insight shepherded us through a ceremony which contained humor, faith, intelligence, and elegance - some truly deep, rousing poetry for the soul.

But we didn't hear any of it... not yet anyway.

What's going through her head?

The rehearsal was more to get us used to being up in front of people and walking through the logistics of the ceremony. In a way, he and his wife were the perfect pair for the job because they essentially treated it like a performance, which (in a way) a wedding is; we really did have discussions about pacing, timing, and ways to keep an audience interested and listening.

Standing up there, though, things still got a little nerve-racking. A few jokes eased the tension, and in about half an hour we were finished.

From there, it was off to Bob Chinn's. For those unfortunate souls who have never been, Bob Chinn's truly does have some of the finest sea food in the country. The decor is reminiscent of Joe's Crab Shack, but don't be fooled - the overly casual atmosphere betrays the high quality of the food. Not surprisingly, dinner was delicious, if a little overwhelming... Normally, when Kate and I go, we split an appetizer and each order an entree. The prie fixe party menu included multiple appetizers, soup, salad, rolls, entree, and dessert - far too much food. Amazing food, granted, but too much nonetheless. I had a Surf n' Turf with clam chowder (sampling everything else, of course), and for once I was unable to finish the meal; and when they brought out dessert? Fuhgeddaboutit.

Hilarious gift... actually tastes pretty good too.

Lobster bib over cardigan over special outfit - cautious!

As I'm sure is true of most brides/grooms, we were worried about how everyone would get along, but I really think everyone had a good time. The air was buzzing, people were laughing, strangers were talking - everything a nervous young couple could want from a party was happening, and I'm happy to say that's how the evening ended too. Nothing but great things.

And I got an awesome jacket for my troubles. How cool is that?